Monday, January 29, 2007

Consuming My Life, For Christie

I haven't been too busy to blog, I am just a little blue about this whole wait. Dang, it's discouraging. Our 7 month LID anniversary was this weekend, and we celebrated in the same fashion as the other months - not doing a damned thing. Matter of fact, I worked for about 4 hours.

Lately, about the only thing I am interested in is Reality TV. Not the State of the Union, not cool shows like Lost and Heroes (I watch them, but I am not on them like a starving dog on a Milk Bone). Oh, I have a lot going on with school, but as far as being interested in it? Meh. Since Christie demanded another post and I must cater to my fans, I am going to talk about the two things that are consuming my life right now...

Lets get the boring out of the way:

1. I have been really active in getting my committee solidified. One person did not work out, and it's for the best. In this situation, I'll believe in fate. My university has recently hired an adjunct I had for a couple of classes. Not only is this person fresh, she's really awesome. Plus she's totally quantitative, so if I have to do a mixed methods study for my dissertation, she's my man. She also bought a dozen boxes of Grrl Scout cookies from my niece. See, I told you she's awesome.

2. I have developed a very strong mentoring relationship with my chair. From the beginning I have really been into working with her, but she's an ace in the poker face. I wouldn't say she has a flat affect, but she's very, very guarded. A few weeks ago, the Dean (who is also on my committee) told me that she deliberates long and hard before agreeing to chair a committee and that she is very selective. What this means is, she likes me! She really likes me! I know that sounds a little weird, but this whole chair/committee building thing has been the bane of my existence for a while now. My confidence, when it comes to this issue, is pretty nonexistent.

3. The trip to Texas is on! I won't be telling when I am leaving, but I will post pictures when we are back. That is if I can find my cord to my camera. I had a slight panic attack over the reservation costs - B's registration was $350 alone! Yikes! My AmEx felt a serious dent to the tune of over $3000. I am so glad B is going with me. We will be reimbursed for everything but my meals. Well, I am glad he's going with me because he's supportive and a whole lotta fun, but still.

1. I cannot wait for the Top Chef showdown on Wednesday. Oh yeah, Marcel is going to kick Ilan's ass! It's really a lesser of two evils situation, but I feel a little sympathy for Marcel. Yeah he's an asshole, but getting assaulted by Cliff and emotionally tortured by everyone else created a little warm spot in my heart for Marcel. I am also digging on his crazy hair. I am really digging on Tom Colicchio. He's a total Alpha Male. Has anyone noticed that Gail eats like she has peanut butter stuck to the roof of her mouth? I had to 8 second rewind the ghetto DVR twice to take a look at that action. Not so pretty. Also, the finale gets me a little closer to Project Runway 4. Come on Heidi and Tim! I'm getting antsy.

2. American Idol is killing me. Just get to the second phase already. It's so not cool to allow people with disabilities to stand there and make asses of themselves while the judges make fun of them. Granted, many of the contestants need a wake up call, and this is the place to get it. Right now I am not feeling anybody. Sundance is a good singer, but he needs to shave the pubes hanging from his chin. Gross. Oh yeah, Randy. I saw you when you toured with Journey's Raised on Radio tour. Can we say asymmetrical fade and red spandex? I remember. My eyes burned for weeks. Do. Not. Make. Fun. Big. Man. Because honestly? Red Spandex. Seriously.

3. The Apprentice: Ah, the Donald. How I love thee in a nonsexual way. Even though Ivanka is swanky and cool, I miss Caroline and her rabid dog smile. I was so sucked into the whole "An Apprentice First: Romance!" shtick. Well, basically it's Nicole thinking Tim is vibing on her. Sister, he might hit it while you're there, but outside of Apprentice La-La Land, you guys are no Rob and Amber.

4. Grease! You're the One That I Want: This show is beyond bad. Almost as bad a Celebrity Duets - I'll never forget the Hal Sparks/Wynona duet. I digress. The only reason I am watching is because my SIL K went all through school with Derek, I think he's the "Wholesome Danny." So all for keeping it real on the hometown success stories, I watched and voted. Once. Only once. Besides, his biggest competition is this freaky guy named Austin who looks like Harry Connick, Jr., has moves like David Copperfield, and is a huge narcissistic dork. I know, those two words are an oxymoron, but he really is a narcissistic dork. Another hometown success is Jen Garner. I think mom and I are going to support her massive career by seeing Catch and Release tomorrow evening at the 4 dollar flicks. I really don't give a rat's ass about Jen Garner, but I love me some Kevin Smith and Timothy Olyphant.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Interviewing Me

Quite often I have these weird third-person-like conversations with myself. Self-talk can be very encouraging or damaging. Most of mine consists of questions and answers that usually all end the same way. A sample...

Question (Q): Why is it that doctor's feel the need to be condescending?

Answer (A): Because you're an educated person and have enough sense to know that your doctor is being an asshole. You need to find a doctor you respect and right now, the only one is your GYN. Ask him to refer you to a less assholish doctor and you will be okay. Quit stressing over the fact that you have fired 3 doctors in the last year and a half and get a grip. *

Q: What's up with the nastiness on the WW message boards? You joined this program why?

A: You joined WW Online because you travel all the time; therefore the convenience of tracking online far exceeds any other negative factor that may be involved. You need to lose weight and this diet works for you. So far you are exercising every other day, have lost some weight, joined a better, more supportive fitness group, and physically feel better. It's a good thing, so get a grip!**

Q: How excited are you that B finally got a promotion and will be getting a significant pay increase?

A: Shitting myself excited. I am very, very proud of B, he's worked so hard for this promotion. We can pay off medical debt accumulated from infertility treatments that were not covered by insurance, get rid of our nasty aluminium siding and get vinyl, and create a budget that will allow me to eventually take a lower paying job that has less travel so I can be home with Ruby every. single. night! It's all good change, so you need to get a grip and take one thing at a time.

Q: Why haven't you been blogging?

A: I am lazy? I am busy with school and work? I just don't want to! Cant you tell I am still freaked out and nervous about the CCAI regs, even though we should be okay? I need to just get a grip and get over myself.

As you can see I spend a lot of time trying to stop my obsessing.

*Yes, I fired another doctor. I am beginning to see that a big part of the problem is me. I have a difficult personality that makes it hard for someone with a God Complex to accept. I question. Often. I believe I am getting a reputation for being a bad patient, and that's okay with me.

**I have been doing WW for 2 weeks, and I feel really good about it. For the first time, I want to stick with the plan. I am walking on my treadmill 4-5X a week and every time I do, I feel awesome. I may be singing a different tune in a few weeks, but we'll see. If I do, don't give me any shit.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Happy Birthday to One Cool Mama!

Happy birthday Nicole! Hope you have a wonderful day!