Sunday, April 30, 2006

The Big "C" - Bully For You

We recently learned that C's biological mom is having some health issues. Earlier this month she had a minor car accident, and while getting X-rays, the physician discovered a goiter/mass on her thyroid. After seeing an endocronologist, getting more tests, and discovering some hinky spots on her lymphnodes, they are pretty sure she has some type of cancer. Wow, pretty scary. It is intensified by the fact that, along with C, she has an 11-month-old and is currently going through a rough divorce. She hasn't always been the nicest person, but no one really deserves to go through this alone.
B & I are trying to be as understanding and helpful as possible. She has surgery on May 15 and we'll be keeping C for at least a week - maybe two. C's brother will be staying with a friend who has a flexible schedule and can stay at the mom's house.
C is taking it pretty well, but she's really having issues at school with her nemesis M. M is an incredible bully who regularly tells C she's stupid, weird, and fat. C handles it okay, but her passivity is allowing M to beat her down daily. We have all attempted to talk with C about not taking her shit, but the benign, benevolent forgiver in C won't stand up. She even tells us how great M is and how nice she can be sometimes. C even goes as far as calling this brat "my friend." When C says these nice things, most of the time I gently remind her that this girl is a bully, and friends don't make you feel like shit on their shoe. Sometimes I just want to shake C and shout, "Get a goddamn backbone! Smack her - it's okay, we'll bail you out!"
Anyways, C came home the other day and said that M has been telling her, "Your mom has cancer and could die. My mom's gonna live - she doesn't have cancer like your mom." Whoa.
I really want to call the teacher on this one, but it's not my place. I have learned over the last 8 years that stepparents have a place to take action, and this is not my place. All I can do is coach from the locker room, dry tears, and continue to try to wipe this fog of "Please like me" from the eyes of my child.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Cookin' With Grease


As you know, I am within walking distance of the main branch of our local library. Being that B and I are driving to D.C. tomorrow, I decided to trek down to find an audiobook. My pal Tami loves the library as much as me, so she came along for the fun.
Our library has an entire media floor so she and I went in opposite directions, and met at the checkout counter. I was armed with James Patterson's The Jester (B will not listen to romance novels on audio, get real). Tami comes waltzing up with Sista Monica Parker's Can't Keep a Good Woman Down. Now Tami isn't one to pick up a gospel CD - she's probably one of the least religious people I know. Nevertheless, she checked it out. When I asked her "Why?", she pointed out two songs on the list: Cookin' With Grease and Put it in the Crock Pot. Okay, that sealed the deal for me too - I had to hear it.
We got back to the office, shut the door and put Sista Monica in, thinking we would have a good laugh. Well, color me surprised! It was pretty good. I can't say I'll ever listen to it again, but the lady's got some pipes.
I decided right then and there if Oprah does her old and fat people version of American Idol, I'm singing Put it in the Crock Pot for sure.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Johnny and Marilyn

B and I received our passports today, which is fabulous! Two weeks earlier than expected, so we're off to D.C. next weekend.
Our pictures are pretty funny. B looks like a criminal/drug runner/cartoon character. B has hair that stands straight up al-la Johnny Bravo. At the time our passport photos were taken, he was in desperate need of a trim.
I look okay, which is saying a lot. I have many pictures where my right eye is going crazy lazy. So no stinkeye, whew! However, I do have a spot on my cheek that does not belong. I told B he'd better watch out, the Visa folks may mistake me for Marilyn Monroe!

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Family Weekend

This past weekend C, B, & I hauled our booties over to Cincinnati for a weekend of family fun. It's been a long time since we went on a vacation, and being that we are spending beaucoup bucks on this adoption, a week-long beach trip is not an option (sigh).
After arriving just in time for Friday-Five-O'clock-Oh-Shit-It's-a-Game Night-Traffic, we finally made it to the hotel. Saturday we got up bright and early and headed across the street to the Netherland Plaza to look around and shop. When I told C that Paris Hilton's family owned this hotel, she asked me if Paris bought it with all the money she makes from acting. B laughed so hard he almost fell over in the street.
Later that afternoon we went to see Peter Pan, part of the Cincinnati on Broadway series. It was phenomenal! Yes, that's Cathy Rigby of Olympic and Stayfree Maxi Pad fame. She's 53 years old and is as flexible as Gumby. B was amazed that someone the same age as his mother-in-law could perform a split without pulling something.
Afterward we headed over to Jeff Ruby's Tropicana restaurant in Newport, KY and paid way more for dinner than we intended. Whoops...
Sunday morning we headed over to the Newport Aquarium to see Sweet Pea the Sharkray. We visited this aquarium 6 years ago when C was 4. She doesn't remember the trip, but B & I had such a good time we decided to go back. The aquarium has expanded to include an otter den and a rainforest area that houses birds that are pretty domesticated. If you pay a buck for a cup of nectar, the birds will literally eat out of your hand. For some reason C decided she was afraid of the birds and her dad and I ended up having all the fun.


Me hanging with the birds.






C pretending to hang with the birds - notice her arm and her dad's hand.
Nice fake.






B feeding one of the more aggressive birds. The bird eventually took the nectar cup and began throwing it back like a shot of scotch.





Good weekend. Good times.