It's a Small, Small World

Ever since B & I decided to adopt from China I have been lurking all over the internet joining forums, reading blogs, researching China, and started blogging myself. I have read about so many interesting people and shared their journeys via the World Wide Web. A year later, Karen and D are anxiously awaiting Maya Papaya, Susan and Will are packing and preparing for their trip to meet Olivia, Lissa and Russell are loving Lydia and Amy and Ruby are having the times of their lives. I think about these families I haven't met. I am surprised by the commonalities we have, and I look forward to sharing their happiness, albeit vicariously.
The one journey I have followed from the beginning has been Karen and Scott's (I can't link to their blog because it's private). I don't know these people, but if I saw them on the street I would stop and ask about their lives. I know about their marriage, their struggles and successes, and their adoption of Gwen from the first stages of the process, through the scary, harrowing first three weeks of being with her and wondering if she would make it through the night, and through the celebrations of her first birthday a few days ago. I also know other personal things that, even though they are strangers, makes me sad and angry and worried. It's hard to believe, but it's true. My thoughts are with these people I really don't know, and I am humbled and amazed by the power of the internet and the power of people.

Not Again!

Having my usual luck, the small burning ember of the homestudy torch that was passed has been returned. Reason being, I need another letter from my doctor regarding my hypertension. Great. As you can recall, back in September, I asked for, received, and promptly thereafter fired my doctor. I have since moved to a new doctor. This guy is nice, but his office staff leave much to be desired.
I make the call, give my info and make my request. The person with whom I am speaking (I have no idea if she's a nurse, assistant, LPN, or receptionist), says, "It's really sad that you have to go through so many hoops to adopt." I let this one slide, because in many ways I agree with her. I respond with, "Yes it is, and this is a last minute hoop, so I would appreciate the letter as quickly as possible." I was hoping this redirection would help expedite the call. Personal phone calls at work are frowned upon, and since I share an office, I try to follow the rules. The rest of the phone call goes like this:
She says, "If you don't mind me asking, where are you adopting from?"
I answer,with a little sense of giddy pride, "We are adopting from China."
Her response, "That's really sad too, when there are so many kids here that need adopted."
My deflated, curt response, "I respect your opinion; this was a very personal decision for my husband and me, and I really don't think this is the point of this phone call. When can I come in to pick up my letter?"
I was so pissed. I know I opened the door, but I viewed it as a) a friendly inquiry, and b) a need to be polite because I was asking for something from these people. But you know what, I don't have to be polite, and unfortunately, I can think of so many meaner, caustic things to say now that I have had time to think. How nice do I have to be? We pay monthly for health insurance, I pay a co-pay every time I walk into the office; I am a customer. The staff at this office are rude, stand-offish, obviously opinionated, and really are all around assholes. I don't think this doctor is worth it. Perhaps I am expecting too much but, I am one of these people who refuses to put my doctor on a pedestal and take his/her word as gospel. I have a decent amount of education, and although I didn't go to medical school (back off), I tend to view my doctor as a peer rather than an authority figure. I know my body better than anyone else and even though I respect and admire the medical profession, I don't have to be treated like shit by my doctor or by his/her staff. I am at an impasse - I didn't like my first doctor, but she had really great staff; I like my new doctor, but I hate his staff. I am giving it a year, which will be September, and I will search again for the perfect blend of doctor and office staff. If I am lucky, I'll find one who gives out lollipops too.

Please Squeeze the Charmin!

So my mom called to tell me this story about my nephew, and I laughed so hard I almost peed my pants. My SIL, Kim decides to take a shower, and, as she steps out, she notices that Chubs is playing with the white terrycloth shower curtain. She also notices that very close to Chubs' little hand is a giant, brown circle approximately the size of a baseball. Not knowing what it could be, Kim picks up the shower curtain and sniffs. Yes, it is shit. The culprit is the mysterious fellow to the right, who fessed up to wiping his ass on the shower curtain because there was no toilet paper available. Hey, no skid marks in the Sponge Bobs allowed!

Passing the Torch

So I just returned from handing off a check for our final homestudy payment as well as the highlighted and corrected version of the final document to our social worker J. Now it's up to B and me to gather and hunt for the remainder of the dossier prep process and get this show on the road.
Although I am happy with our agency - they've been super nice, I am sort of wishing we had gone with our other choice, paid the extra 900 bucks, and let them do all of this prep. I am so afraid that I am going to drop the ball and drag this out even longer than it's already taking. Fortunately I have some floating holidays I can take. I am planning to take one in the next week or so and knock this out. Wish me luck!

Cha-Cha-Ching

Here we have C, lover of stuffed animals, Gwen Stefani's "Hollaback Girl," hooker makeup (thus the bright blue eyeshadow), television, ham sandwiches with ketchup, "Bohemian Rhapsody," and American Idol. C also has no, count 'em, NO fashion sense, difficulty remembering to shampoo, a very bad habit of farting in public places, and a great need for orthodontia.
Neither B nor I needed braces, so when C had her first appointment with Dr. T to apply brackets and bands, B listened closely and took notes. You would think he was being quizzed or something. We non-braces people learned that all things good are forbidden when wearing braces. Especially braces that set your parents back $7400. Apparently B thought C was listening as closely as he was. He was wrong.
Here's the scene:

1. B & C arrive and are shuttled into an assembly line of chairs at 8:00 am.
2. By 8:30 am, the purple and pink (remember I said NO fashion sense) first set of braces are applied and the note-taking lecture ensued
3. At 8:35 am B signs an ironclad contract agreeing to pay big bucks for this kid's mouth.
4. At 8:36 am B writes a check for $550, the first of many, many to come.
5. C arrives at school, braces shining by 9:00 am
6. B arrives at work by 9:25 am.
7. At approximately 11:02 am B receives a phone call from C's mother informing him that C ate Nerds at break, popped a bracket, and is hysterically crying in the nurse's office at school.
8. 4:00 pm B & C are shuttled into an assembly line of chairs for the second time in one day.
9. By 4:10 pm the bracket is repaired, the second lecture has taken place, and C appears remorseful and attentive.
10. Finally, at 6:30 pm B gets a phone call from C saying, "Dad, I ate soup for dinner."

See what I mean?

Rock Star

Happy First Birthday, Chubs!

Resolutions

I don't make New Year's resolutions. It's too much pressure. Being an inordinately lazy person, resolutions open doors to failure and add more stress to my taxed brain when I think about all of the things I should be doing. Think about it - I am lazy; therefore I lament regularly on what I should be and could be doing instead of being lazy and lounging around. Compound that with additional resolutions that usually revolve around some type of life improvement like losing weight, exercising more, blogging regularly, or cleaning my closets makes for undue stress, consequently hurting my brain and exhausting me to the point where I have to have to lie down for a while.
Although I may be exaggerating, I believe I have a point. Instead of resolutions that revolve around change and improvement, I have decided to take things as they come, and resolve to make acceptances:
I resolve to accept my laziness as a part of who I am.
I resolve to accept the fact that I procrastinate things to the point of crisis.
I resolve to accept that my thighs rub together.
I resolve to accept that this adoption is taking way longer than I want.
I resolve to accept that C has horrible fashion sense and enjoys looking like a clown on crack.
I resolve to accept my lack of organization.
I resolve to accept that I am obsessed with the mail, shoes, and books.
I resolve to accept my romance novel addiction with pride instead of shame.
I resolve to accept that I am a bad friend that rarely calls or emails, but still loves and worries about my pals.
I resolve to accept I will never stop having pimples even though I am thisclose to my 35th birthday.
I resolve to accept my self-absorption.